September 2014

Monthly Archives

Latest stories

  • Ginger!

    A woman goes to her boyfriend’s parents’ house for dinner. This is her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal. The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost […] More

  • Bad gums

    There was a father and his young son who lived in a secluded village somewhere in central Australia. The boy’s mother had left the father under difficult circumstances, and he had had bad experiences with women ever since. So he took his boy aside one day and told him, “Listen son, don’t go messing around […] More

  • Ouch! That hurts!

    A young woman said to her doctor, ‘You have to help me, I hurt all over.’ ‘What do you mean?’ said the doctor. The woman touched her right knee with her index finger and yelled,’Ow, that hurts.’ Then she touched her left cheek and again yelled, ‘Ouch! That hurts, too.’ Then she touched her right […] More

  • Two Irishmen

    Two Irishmen, Patrick & Michael, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a burning freighter. While rummaging through the boat’s provisions, Patrick stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of Patrick, a genie came forth. This particular genie, however, […] More

  • Marriage Vows!

    When Joe, a nice man married for over 50 years died, his wife, Myrtle was devastated. A couple of months later, Myrtle also died. Once in heaven, Myrtle anxiously looked for Joe. Suddenly, behind a Cloud, she could clearly see him with another woman. She ran towards him, calling his name, “Joe. Darling, Joe” Joe […] More

  • Speech Impediment

    Two life-long friends were enjoying a few pints down at the local bar, when one said to the other: “If I ask you a question, will you promise to answer me honestly?” “Yeah, sure thing,” replied his friend, “fire away.” “Well,” said the first guy, “why do you think all the guys around here find […] More

  • Blind Man

    Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus. So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. […] More

  • Stern Warning!

    Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently scold the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, “Johnny, when I was a child, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that.” Little Johnny looked up […] More

  • No a Member

    Three women are in a gym locker room dressing up to play racquetball when suddenly a guy runs through the room wearing nothing but a bag over his head. He passes the first woman, who looks down at his penis. “He’s not my husband,” she says. He passes by the second woman, who also looks […] More

  • Rash Driving!

    A couple hired a new chauffeur. The memsahib asked him to take her out for shopping and was very shaken by the experience. Back home, she pleaded with her husband, “Please dear, you must sack this new chauffeur at once. He is so rash he nearly killed me three times this morning.” “Darling, don’t be […] More

  • Use The Word

    A pre-school teacher says to her class, “Who can use the word “definitely” in a sentence?” First a little girl says, “The sky is definitely blue.” The teacher says, “Sorry, Amy, but the sky can also be grey or orange.” Then a little boy says, “Trees are definitely green.” “Sorry, but in the autumn the […] More

  • Husband for sale

    A store where a woman may go to choose a husband has opened in Auckland. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates: “You may visit this store only once! There are six floors, and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper […] More

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