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Monthly Archives: January 2016

Man and his Curse

A man has a curse, he is only able to say a single word every year. But if he doesn’t say a word that year he can say two the next year, then three, and so on. One day he meets a beautiful woman and wants to ask her to marry him, but he has no words saved up so ... Read More »

Divorce Counselling

A couple whose marriage was going on the rocks sought the advice of a marriage counsellor. The counsellor pleaded with them to patch up their quarrel, but they were adamant. “So,” said the counsellor, “you know the consequences and you want to part. Remember this. You must divide your property equally.” The wife flared up. “You mean the $4,000 I ... Read More »

Mother-In-Law

A husband and wife had a fight. Wife called her mom: He fought with me again, I am coming to stay with you. Mom: No dear, he must pay for his mistake. I am coming to stay with you! Read More »

Taming The Lion

Two unemployed guys are talking. One says, “I’m going to become a lion tamer.” The other replies, “That’s crazy, you don’t know nothing about no lion taming.” “Yes I do!” “Well, OK, answer me this. When one of those lions comes at you all roaring and biting, what you gonna do?” “Well, then I take that big chair they all ... Read More »

Husband and Wine

A couple are sitting in their living room, sipping wine. Out of the blue, the wife says, “I love you!” “Is that you or the wine talking?” asks the husband. “It’s me,” says the wife. “Talking to the wine.” Read More »

The Fiance

A young woman brings home her fiance to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells her father to find out more about the young man. The father invites the fiancee to his study to find out more about him. “So what are your plans?” the father asks. “I am a bible scholar” the young man replies. “A bible scholar, ... Read More »

FBI Agent

A rancher was minding his own business when an FBI agent came up up to him and said, “We got a tip that you may be growing illegal drugs on the premises. Do you mind if I take a look around?” The old rancher replied, “That’s fine, you shouldn’t go over there though.” As he pointed at one of his ... Read More »

The Practical People

A Lady was conducting her anti drinking campaign outside a bar. A man came out of the Bar exuding alcohol fumes and the Lady said, “Reflect !! If you arrive at the Gates of Heaven with your breath smelling of liquor… Do you think the Lord will let you in ???” “My good woman,” passionately holding her hand, said the ... Read More »

Sally’s Report Card

Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school. Her marks were good…mostly A’s and a couple of B’s. However, her teacher had written across the bottom: Sally is a smart little girl, but she has one fault. She talks too much in school. I have an idea I am going to try, which I think may break her of ... Read More »

New Hearing Aid

An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, “Your hearing is perfect. Your family ... Read More »

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