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Monthly Archives: November 2016

Who’s Kidding Who?

(Grandpa) “Honey did you know that kids these days don’t put their tooth under the pillow for the tooth fairy? What they do is take a digital image and upload it to the toothfairy website they then get paid in bit coins.” (Grandma) “Dear, you’ve been talking to your grandson again and he’s pulling your leg.” (Grandpa) “Billy, why would ... Read More »

Wishbone

One Thanksgiving a grandfather and his grandson broke the wishbone from the turkey. The boy was bitterly disappointed to find himself holding the small end of the bone. “Don’t worry,” the grandfather comforted the child. “My wish was that your wish would come true.” Read More »

Idea of marrying..

A young man proposes marriage to his sweetheart. The girl replies, “If I marry you, will you promise to give up smoking?” “Yes, I will,” came the reply. “And drinking?” “I will give up drinking as well.” “And going to the club with your cronies?” “Yes, I will.” “And what else will you give up for my sake?” she asked ... Read More »

Does a lawyer…

A young boy walked up to his father and asked, “Dad? Does a lawyer ever tell the truth?” The father thought for a moment. “Yes son,” he replied, “Sometimes a lawyer will do anything to win a case.” Read More »

Thank you!

A teenager who had just received her learner’s permit for driving offered to drive her parents to church. After a hair-raising ride, they finally reached their destination. “Thank you!” said the mother as she got out of the car and breathed a sigh of relief. “Anytime,” her daughter replied. As the mother closed the door she said, “I wasn’t talking ... Read More »

Fishing secrets

There was a competition between a team of blondes and a team of brunettes to see who could catch the most fish ice fishing. Once the contest started, it was clear that the brunettes were going to win, they kept pulling out fish after fish. Soon, the blondes got worried and sent over one of their team to see what ... Read More »

Footprint

A man sitting at a lunch counter has just been served his food when he calls the waiter back. “Waiter,” he says, “can you explain why there is a footprint in the middle of this food that I ordered?” “Yes, sir,” replies the waiter. “You rushed in here, asked for a large omelet and told me to step on it.” Read More »

Lottery

Two old married men chatting in a bar. First man says, “Have you ever thought that marriage was a bit of a lottery?” The second man replied, “Not at all. At least you have a slight chance with a lottery.” Read More »

Friend call

After being with a new girl all evening, the man couldn’t take another minute with her. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave if something like this happened. When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, ... Read More »

Think!

In the men’s room at work, the Boss had placed a sign directly above the sink. It had a single word on it — “Think!” The next day, when he went to the men’s room, he looked at the sign and right below, immediately above the soap dispenser, someone had carefully lettered another sign which read — “Thoap!” Read More »

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