Joke of the day
Home » Animal Jokes (page 5)

Category Archives: Animal Jokes

Feed Subscription

The Bear

Two campers where hiking in the forest when all of a sudden a bear jumps out of a bush and starts chasing them. Both campers start running for their lives when one of them stops and starts to put on his running shoes. His partner says, “What are you doing? You can’t outrun a bear!” His friend replies, “I don’t ... Read More »

Do Cats Go to Heaven?

A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, “You have been a good cat all of these years. Anything you desire is yours, all you have to do is ask.” The cats says, “Well, I lived all my life with a poor family on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors.” ... Read More »

That Darn Cat

A man who absolutely hated his wife’s cat decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he was nearing home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day, he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away and try the same thing. As ... Read More »

Talking Dog For Sale

This guy sees a sign in front of a house “Talking Dog for Sale.” He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the back yard. The guy goes into the back yard and sees a mutt sitting there.”You talk?” he asks.”Yep,” the mutt replies.”So, what’s your story?”The mutt looks up and says “Well, I discovered ... Read More »

Animal Pictures

One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is. No one raises his/her hand. The teacher says “See it’s long neck? What animal has a long neck?” Sally holds up her hand and asks if it is a giraffe. “Very good Sally,” the ... Read More »

The Rare Parrot

A young man’s mother was now living in the big city and he didn’t see her that often. His father was no longer around and he was worried that his mom was lonely. For her birthday, he purchased a rare parrot, trained to speak seven languages. He had a courier deliver the bird to his dear mother. A few days ... Read More »

Pet Monkey

Guy in a bar playing pool has a pet monkey. Monkey jumps onto the table, grabs the cue ball and stuffs it into his mouth and swallows it. Bartender freaks and starts yelling about how much cue balls cost , etc. The guy tries to calm him down and tells him the monkey will pass it in the next day ... Read More »

Smart Cat

A man absolutely hated his wife’s cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and ... Read More »

Squirrels are Nuts!

A pedestrian stepped off the curb to cross the street and a car suddenly came screaming around the corner and headed straight for him. He started to run, trying to get out of the way but the car changed lanes and was still coming at him. He turned around to go back to the curb but the car changed lanes ... Read More »

Smaller Eggs!

It seems that God received a delegation of animals complaining of their lot. They were an elephant, a giraffe, and a hen. The elephant complained, “Lord, I HATE THIS TRUNK YOU have given me. It gets in the way, and makes me look like a fool!” The Lord said, “Don’t complain. It lets you pick up food, drink water, etc. ... Read More »

Scroll To Top