Original Colors
Teacher : Which is the oldest animal? Student : The zebra. Teacher : How come? Student : Because it’s still in black & white. More
Animal Jokes
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Good animal jokes are hard to come by, but we’ve collected our favorites here to get you howling, hooting and roaring with laughter. EPIC!
Don’t forget to share them with family and friends!
Subterms
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Lunch Break
When a squirrel slipped into my house, I did the logical thing: I panicked and called my father. “How do you get a squirrel out of a basement?” I shrieked. Dad advised me to leave a trail of peanut butter and crackers from the basement to the outside. It worked—the squirrel ate his way out […] More
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Missing Dog
An old farmer is inconsolable after his dog goes missing. He takes out an ad in the newspaper, but two weeks later, there’s still no sign of the mutt. “What did you write in the ad?” his wife asks. “Here, boy,” he replies. More
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Take them to the zoo!
A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says, “You can’t drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately.” The guy obliges and drives away. The next day, the officer sees the same guy driving around with […] More
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The Anxious Poodle
Poodle: “My life is a mess. My owner is mean, my girlfriend is leaving me for a German shepherd, and I’m as nervous as a cat.” Collie: “Why don’t you go see a psychiatrist?” Poodle: “I can’t. I’m not allowed on the couch.” More
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Millions of Years Ago
While at the dinosaur exhibit in Disney’s Animal Kingdom park, I overheard a confused woman complaining to her friend. She said, “How could they possibly know the names of all those dinosaurs if they died 75 million years ago? And another thing, how do we even know they were called dinosaurs?” More
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Probably in the carburetor
A man’s car stalled on a country road. When he got out to fix it, a cow came along and stopped beside him. “Your trouble is probably in the carburetor,” said the cow. Startled, the man jumped back and ran down the road until he met a farmer. He told the farmer his story. “Was […] More
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The Lost Talking Bird
My father’s secretary was visibly distraught one morning when she arrived at the office and explained that her children’s parrot had escaped from his cage and flown out an open window. Of all the dangers the tame bird would face outdoors alone, she seemed most concerned about what would happen if the bird started talking. […] More
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