Children Jokes | Hot Jokes

Greeting Card Quest

A little boy had been pawing over the stock of greeting cards at a stationery store. After a few minutes the clerk became curious and asked, “Just what is it you’re looking for, sonny? Birthday greeting? Message to a sick friend? Anniversary congratulations to your mom and dad?” The boy shook his head, “No.” “Then […] More

Family Planning

A six-year-old boy told his father he wanted to marry the little girl across the street. The father being modern and well-schooled in handling children, hid his smile behind his hand. “That’s a serious step,” he said, “Have you thought it out completely?” “Sure,” his young son answered. “We can spend one week in my […] More

Boy Scout on the plane

A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy scout and a pastor were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a small private plane. Suddenly, the plane developed engine trouble. In spite of the best efforts of the pilot, the plane started to go down. Finally, the pilot grabbed a parachute, yelled to the passengers that […] More

Buying a horse

Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horses legs and rump, and chest.. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, “Dad, why are you doing that?” His father replied, “Because when I am buying horses, I have […] More

Slow Mom, Fast Mom!

Little Freddie’s mother was in the hospital, and he was paying a visit to see his new brother. He wandered into an adjoining room which was occupied by a woman with a broken leg. “Hello,” he said. “How long have you been here?” “Oh, about a month.” “Let me see your baby,” he then asked. […] More

The Watch

Little Johnny sees that his friend at school has a new watch so he asks him how he got it. “I waited until I heard the bedsprings squeaking in my folk’s bedroom and then I ran in. My father gave me a watch to get rid of me.”, replied the little friend. Little Johnny, thinking […] More

Whale

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a […] More

Shakespeare’s Lesson

A young lad and his mother were walking down the street one day when suddenly the boy yelled out excitedly, “Mother, Mother, Look at that bowlegged man!” His mother immediately hushed him explaining it was not polite to make fun of bowlegged people. The next day the same thing happened. “Look mother, there’s that bowlegged […] More

How do you mean?

A little girl was out with her Grandmother when they came across a couple of dogs mating on the sidewalk. “What are they doing, Grandma?” asked the little girl. The grandmother was embarrassed, so she said, “The dog on top has hurt his paw, and the one underneath is carrying him to the doctor.” “They’re […] More

Slogans…

A class professor was giving a lecture on company slogans and was asking his students if they were familiar with them. “Joe,” he asked, “which company has the slogan, ‘come fly the friendly skies’?” Joe answered the correct airline. “Brenda, can you tell me which company has the slogan, “Don’t leave home without it?” Brenda […] More

Who Is That?

A young boy was looking through some old family photos and asked his mother, “Who is the guy on the beach with you with all the muscles and curly hair?” “That’s your father.” “Then who’s that man who lives with us now?” More

How did you guess?

The teacher noticed that Johnny had been daydreaming for a long time. She decided to get his attention.”Johnny,” she said, “If the world is 25,000 miles around and eggs are sixty cents a dozen, how old am I? “Thirty-four,” Johnny answered unhesitatingly. The teacher replied “Well, that’s not far from my actual age. Tell me…how […] More

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