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Midday Surprise

The week we got our puppy, I caught a stomach bug and stayed home from work one day. That afternoon, my wife called to check up on me. “I’m okay,” I said. “But guess who pooped in the dining room?” My wife’s response, “Who?” Read More »

Changing Voice

My sister explained to my nephew how his voice would eventually change as he grew up. Tyler was exuberant at the prospect. “Cool!” he said. “I hope I get a German accent.” Read More »

Teacher Test

To make his class interesting, an English language teacher asked a grade 3 student to challenge him in an English test. The student wrote this word on the classroom board, SIDANDTED, and asked his teacher to explain its meaning. The teacher looked at the word for some time and even searched for its meaning in the dictionary. After several minutes ... Read More »

Who’s counting

A lady called up a pet store and said, “I’d like to order 2,000 cockroaches.” “What in the world do you want with 2,000 cockroaches?” asked the astonished clerk. “Well,” she replied, “I am moving today, and my lease says I must leave the premises in exactly the same condition I found it.” Read More »

Volume Control

It seemed that all our appliances had broken in the same week, and repairs were straining our budget. So when I picked up the kids from school and our Jeep started making rattling sounds, I decided that rather than burden my husband, I’d deal with it. When we got home, the kids rushed right into the house with the news. ... Read More »

Baby brother or sister

For weeks a six-year old boy kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house. One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements of the unborn child. The six-year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacher about the impending event. The teacher ... Read More »

Hear Mommy say

A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said, “Would you like to say the blessing?” “I wouldn’t know what to say,” the girl replied. “Just say what you hear Mommy say,” the wife answered. The daughter bowed her head and said, “Lord, why on earth did I invite all these ... Read More »

A Porsche costs

A fifteen year-old boy came home with a Porsche and his parents began to yell and scream, “Where did you get that car?” He calmly told them, “I bought it today.” “With what money?” demanded his parents. We know what a Porsche costs…” “Well,” said the boy, “this one cost me fifteen dollars.” So the parents began to yell even ... Read More »

Solve the problem

The young blonde bride made her first appointment with a gynecologist and told him that she and her husband wished to start a family. “We’ve been trying for months now, doctor, and I don’t seem to be able to get pregnant,” she confessed miserably. “I’m sure we’ll solve your problem,” the doctor reassured her. “If you’ll just take off your ... Read More »

Serious problem

Tom went to see her psychiatrist, Dr. Jackson. Tom pleaded to the doctor, “My wife needs help, she thinks she’s ME!” Dr. Jackson said, “That seems to be a serious problem. I will need to see her. Can you get her here to see me.” Tom replied, “But, Dr. Jackson, here I am!” Read More »

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