Joke of the day

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  • Having a Beer

    A man walks into a bar and orders three beers. He takes a drink out of one… sets it down. Takes a drink out of the second… sets it down. Takes a drink out of the third one… sets it down and repeats this process until all three beers are gone. The man then leaves. […] More

  • Shakespeare’s Lesson

    A young lad and his mother were walking down the street one day when suddenly the boy yelled out excitedly, “Mother, Mother, Look at that bowlegged man!” His mother immediately hushed him explaining it was not polite to make fun of bowlegged people. The next day the same thing happened. “Look mother, there’s that bowlegged […] More

  • Anything like this before?!

    A man decided to paint the toilet while his wife was away. His wife came home sooner than he expected, used the toilet, and got the seat stuck to her rear. She was understandably distraught about this and asked her husband to drive her to the doctor. She put a large overcoat on to cover […] More

  • Slogans…

    A class professor was giving a lecture on company slogans and was asking his students if they were familiar with them. “Joe,” he asked, “which company has the slogan, ‘come fly the friendly skies’?” Joe answered the correct airline. “Brenda, can you tell me which company has the slogan, “Don’t leave home without it?” Brenda […] More

  • Lord, Don’t Let Me Be Late!

    A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class. As she ran she prayed, “Dear Lord, please don’t let me be late! Dear Lord, please don’t let me be late!”As she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and […] More

  • Who Is That?

    A young boy was looking through some old family photos and asked his mother, “Who is the guy on the beach with you with all the muscles and curly hair?” “That’s your father.” “Then who’s that man who lives with us now?” More

  • We Can

    On the farm where I was raised, home canning was a big thing. Most folks had a garden and ate out of it all summer, the surplus was put up in bottles for the winter. The common saying was: “WE EAT WHAT WE CAN, AND WHAT WE CAN’T, WE CAN.” More

  • Are you in great pain?

    Doctor: You have a broken leg, a broken arm, four fractured ribs, and probably a brain concussion. Are you in great pain? Patient: Only when I laugh! More

  • Did I step on your toe?

    At the movie theater, a young man returning to his seat taps the arm of a woman in the last seat in the row. “Excuse me,” he says, “but did I step on your toe on the way out?” “As a matter of fact, you did,” says the woman, expecting an apology. “Oh good,” says […] More

  • Excuses, Excuses

    Jones came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting for him. “What’s the story this time, Jones?” he asked sarcastically. “Let’s hear a good excuse for a change.” Jones sighed, “Everything went wrong this morning, Boss. My wife decided to drive me to the […] More

  • Comparing stories

    Two women are new arrivals at the pearly gates and are comparing stories on how they died. Woman #1: I froze to death. Woman #2: How horrible! Woman #1: It wasn’t so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about […] More

  • Cure for a Cough

    The owner of a drugstore walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall with an odd look on his face. The owner asks the clerk, “What’s with that guy over there by the wall?” The clerk says, “Well, he came in here at 7 A.M. to get something for his cough. I […] More

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