Joke of the day

Subterms

Latest stories

  • Anything you say

    A man is being arrested by a female police officer, who informs him, “Anything you say can and will be held against you.” The man replies, “Boobs!” More

  • Parking

    Michael and his wife live in Minnesota. One winter morning while listening to WCCO, they hear the announcer say, “We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through.” Michael’s wife goes out and […] More

  • Tips for New Year Booze

    1. Symptom : Cold and humid feet. Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring the Drink on your feet). Cure: Manoeuver glass until open end is facing upward. 2. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights. Cause: You’re lying on the floor. Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree […] More

  • Sleeping pills

    An exhausted looking blonde dragged himself in to the doctor’s office. “Doctor, there are dogs all over my neighborhood. They bark all day and all night, and I can’t get a wink of sleep.” “I have good news for you,” the doctor answered, rummaging through a drawer full of sample medications. “Here are some new […] More

  • Stealing a Bus

    Because they’ve spent all their cash on booze during a night on the town, Dave and Eric have no money for a taxi home. Dave has a drunken idea. “Let’s steal a bus!” He persuades Eric to break into the bus station. But 20 minutes later, Eric has failed to emerge. Dave sticks his head […] More

  • Sharing Everything

    A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at McDonald’s. He noticed that they had ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries, one for him, one for her, until each had half of them. Then […] More

  • Swimming is prohibited

    Officer: “Madam, swimming is prohibited in this lake.” Lady: “Why didn’t you tell me when I was removing my clothes?” Officer: “Well, that’s not prohibited.” More

  • The Playground

    Little Johnny sees his Daddy’s car passing the playground and going into the woods. Curious, he follows the car and sees Daddy and Aunt Jane kissing. Johnny finds this so exciting and can barely contain himself as he runs home and starts to tell his mother excitedly. “MOMMY, MOMMY, I WAS AT THE PLAYGROUND AND […] More

  • Reward

    A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of shopping. It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her. Looking in her purse, she commented: “Hmmm… That’s funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are 20 $1 bills.” The boy quickly replied: “That’s right, […] More

  • Two mothers-in-law

    Danny was being tried for Bigamy in a court. After the judge passed his sentence, he asked Danny, “Have you learnt your lesson and realized what a bad thing it is to have more than one wife.” “Yes, your honor, I have,” he replied. “What is it that you realized?” the judge asked. Danny replied, […] More

  • Insomnia

    A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination but found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him. “Listen,” the doctor said, “if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your troubles to bed with you.” “I know,” said the man, “but I […] More

  • Success

    A man was walking along the street when he saw a ladder going into the clouds. As any of us would do, he climbed the ladder. He reached a cloud, upon which sat a rather plump and very ugly woman. “Screw me or climb the ladder to success,” she said. No contest, thought the man, […] More

Load More
Congratulations. You've reached the end of the internet.