Bad news

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  • Good news…bad news…

    “I have good news and bad news,” a defense attorney told his client. “First the bad news: The blood test came back, and your DNA is an exact match with the sample found on the victim’s dress.” “Oh, no – I’m ruined!” cried the client. “What’s the good news?” “Your cholesterol is down to 140!” More

  • Six months to live

    “Mr. Clark, I’m afraid I have bad news,” the doctor told his anxious patient. “You only have six months to live.” The man sat in stunned silence for several minutes. Regaining his composure, he apologetically announced that he had no medical insurance. “I can’t possibly pay you in that time,” he said. “OK,” the doctor […] More

  • Gallery Sale

    An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in her paintings that were on display. “Well, I have good news and bad news,” the owner responded. “The good news is that a gentleman noticed your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. I told him it […] More

  • Bad news

    This guy goes into a doctor’s office.the doctor says “oh mr Jones!We have the results of your test.do you want the bad news first or the very bad news?” The guy shrugs and says “Well I guess I’ll have the bad news first”. “Well the bad news is, you have 24 hours to live the […] More