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Monthly Archives: August 2014

Cheers Everybody!

In our life, problems may go from “Haywards 2000” to “Haywards 5000”, but we must take them as a “Royal Challenge” otherwise people will call us “Old Monk” and put a “Black Label” on our name. So, we must learn from “Teachers” to fight like “Jack Daniel”, live like a “Bagpiper”, walk like “Johny Walker”, work till “8 PM” & ... Read More »

The Vase

A guy goes to a girl’s house for the first time, and she shows him into the living room. She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to make them a few drinks, and as he’s standing there alone, he notices a cute little vase on the mantel. He picks it up, and as he’s looking at it, she walks ... Read More »

Two lions

Two lions were lying around in the jungle. One of them his licking his a$$hole. The other lion asked him, “Why are you licking your a$$hole?” The second lion replied, “Aww, I just ate a lawyer and I’m trying to get the taste out of my mouth.” Read More »

Dining Companion

A man and a beautiful woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress (taking another order at a table a few paces away) suddenly noticed that the man was slowing sliding down his chair and under the table, but the woman acted unconcerned. The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out ... Read More »

Cabbie

One dismal rainy night in Sydney a taxi driver spotted an arm waving from the shadows of an alley. Even before he rolled to a stop at the curb, a figure leaped into the cab and slammed the door. Checking his rear view mirror as he pulled away, he was startled to see a dripping wet, naked woman sitting in ... Read More »

The Magical Frog

John went to the doctor one day. ” Dr. I don’t know what to do. The women are scared of me. My pen_is is too long. What can I do?” The doctor meassured it and it was 24 inches long. “Well, you have 2 choices. One, you can have it surgically downsized. Or two, you can go ask a certain ... Read More »

Stay Away from Mom when

Teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the regular types of stuff. But then the teacher realised that only Little Johnny was left. “Johnny, do you ... Read More »

How to Cure a Headache

A guy has been suffering from severe headaches for years with no relief. After trying all the usual cures he’s referred to a headache specialist by his family doctor. The doctor asks him what his symptoms are and he replies. “I get these blinding headaches; kind of like a knife across my scalp and….” He is interrupted by the doctor, ... Read More »

Crossed Eyed Bull

Farmer Brown, from Minnesota, had a bull that he was quite proud of. One day he looked at the bull and noticed his eyes were crossed. That was disconcerting, because he knew he couldn’t get huge stud fees for a defective bull. He called the local vet who came right over. The vet assured him he could solve the problem. ... Read More »

Irish Sugar Test

One day Paddy, an Irishman, goes into a pharmacy, reaches into his pocket and takes out a small Irish whiskey bottle and a teaspoon. He pours some liquid onto the teaspoon and offers it to the pharmacist and says, “Could you taste this for me, please?” The pharmacist takes the teaspoon, puts it in his mouth, swills the liquid around ... Read More »

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