Latest stories

  • Speeding Judges!

    Two small county judges both got arrested for speeding on the same day. Rather than call the state Supreme Court for a visiting judge, each agreed to hear the other’s case. The first judge took the bench while the second stood at the defendant’s table, and admitted his guilt. The sentencing judge immediately suspended both […] More

  • Pretending

    There was a loser who couldn’t get a date. He went to a bar and asked this one guy how to get a date. The guy said, “It’s simple. I just say, I’m a lawyer.” So, the guy went up to a pretty woman and asked her out. After she said no, he told her […] More

  • Good news…bad news…

    “I have good news and bad news,” a defense attorney told his client. “First the bad news: The blood test came back, and your DNA is an exact match with the sample found on the victim’s dress.” “Oh, no – I’m ruined!” cried the client. “What’s the good news?” “Your cholesterol is down to 140!” More

  • Not guilty?

    After a two-week criminal trial in a very high profile bank robbery case, the judge turns to the jury foreman and asks, “Has the jury reached a verdict in this case?” “Yes, we have, your honor,” The foreman responded. “Would you please pass it to me,” The judge declared, as he motioned for the bailiff […] More

  • Dealing with bribes

    Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faced the opposing lawyers. “So,” he said, “I have been presented, by both of you, with a bribe.” Both lawyers squirmed uncomfortably. “You, attorney Leon, gave me $15,000. And you, attorney Campos, gave me $10,000.” The judge reached into his pocket and pulled out a check. He […] More

  • Maths problem

    Little Johnny was in Maths class when the teacher asked the class to solve a problem. The problem was like this: A rich man worth twenty million dollars dies. One fourth of his wealth goes to his wife, one third to his daughter, and one fifth to his nephew, and the rest is donated to […] More

  • Orange

    The professor of a contract law class asked one of his better students, “If you were to give someone an orange, how would you go about it?” The student replied, “Here’s an orange.” The professor was outraged. “No! No! Think like a lawyer!” The student then replied, “Okay. I’d tell him `I hereby give and […] More

  • Law Class!

    The professor of a contract law class asked one of his better students, “If you were to give someone an orange, how would you go about it?” The student replied, “Here’s an orange.” The professor was outraged. “No! No! Think like a lawyer!” The student then replied, “Okay. I’d tell him ‘I hereby give and […] More

  • New Secretary

    Two High Court lawyers hired a secretary from a small town in the hills. She was attractive, and really hot but it was obvious that she knew nothing about city life. One attorney said to the other, “Our secretary is so young, pretty and naive that she might be taken advantage of by some of […] More

  • NASA Mars Mission

    NASA was interviewing professionals they were planning on sending to Mars. The touchy part was that only one guy could go and it would be a one way trip, the guy would never return to Earth. The interviewer asked the first applicant, an engineer, how much he wanted to be paid for going. “One million […] More

  • Classic Comeback

    If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman’s credibility. Q: Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene? A: No sir. But I subsequently […] More

  • Burglary Witness

    An old man was a witness in a burglary case. The defense lawyer asked Sam, “Did you see my client commit this burglary?” “Yes,” said Sam, “I saw him plainly take the goods.” The lawyer asks Sam again, “Sam, this happened at night. Are you sure you saw my client commit this crime?” “Yes, says […] More

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