2014

Yearly Archives

Latest stories

  • Terrible news

    This guy was sitting in his attorney’s office. His lawyer says: “Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?” “Give me the bad news first,” he says. “Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars,” his lawyer informs him. “That’s the bad news?” asks the man incredulously. “I can’t wait to […] More

  • Great News

    The day after a man lost his wife in a scuba diving accident, he was greeted by two grim-faced policemen at his door. “We’re sorry to call on you at this hour, Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife.” “Well, tell me!” the man said. The policeman said: “We have some bad […] More

  • The Wooden Ball

    An old man walks into the barbershop for a shave and haircut, but he tells the barber he probably can’t get all of his whiskers off because his cheeks are wrinkled from age. The barber gets a little wooden ball from a cup on the shelf and tells him to put it inside his cheek […] More

  • Exactly like The MOON

    One day a Professor was talking about marriage in the class. Professor: What kind of Wife would you like Little Johnny? Little Johnny: I would want a wife like the moon. Professor: Wow !!! What a choice… So you want her to be Cool & Calm like the moon? Little Johnny: No, no… Professor: Oh, […] More

  • Organic

    My wife asked me to buy ORGANIC vegetables from the market. I went and looked around and couldn’t find any. So I grabbed an old, tired looking employee and said, “These vegetables are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?” “The produce guy looked at me and said, “No. You’ll have […] More

  • Nightie

    A man and his wife were celebrating their 50th anniversary, so he bought her a $100 see-through nightie. That night, she was getting ready for bed and realized the nightie was still in its box downstairs. Walking naked through the house, she passed her husband who said: “Jesus, for $100 they could’ve at least ironed […] More

  • Olive

    A blonde was hunched over the bar, toothpick in hand, spearing futilely at the olive in her drink. A dozen times the olive eluded her. Finally, another patron, who had been watching intently from the next stool, became exasperated and grabbed the toothpick. “Here, this is how you do it.” he said, as he easily […] More

  • Magic Window

    Two guys are sitting at a bar. “You know why I love this bar?” asks the first one. “No,” says the second guy. “Why do you love this bar?” The first guy points at the window, which is six stories above the ground. “It has a magic window,” he says. “You jump out of that […] More

  • Excuses!

    A married man decided to work late to be with his sexy secretary, so he called his wife to make up an excuse. After work he invited his secretary to dinner. It soon became obvious that he was going to get lucky, so the two went back to her apartment and had great sⱸx for […] More

  • Dentist

    A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl’s place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes of his trousers and washes his hands again. The girl has been watching him […] More

  • Boss Issues

    A boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn’t getting any respect. Later that morning he went to a local sign shop and bought a small sign that read, “I’m the Boss”. He then taped it to his office door. Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found […] More

  • A Doctors Lecture

    A Doctor was addressing a large audience. “The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term […] More

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