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Monthly Archives: January 2015

Most Preferred Husbands

Believe it or not…. Lawyers are the most preferred husbands for ladies. Surprised? Don’t be, I asked a girl why do you prefer a lawyer to marry? She Said: They bow their head while entering the room and again while going out. They say ‘your honor,’ ‘my lord’ before and after every world. They don’t have male ego because they ... Read More »

Did you see me?

A man walks in a bank, pulls out a gun, and robs the bank… Then he turns around and asks the next customer in line, “Did you see me rob this bank?” The customer replies, “YES!” The robber raises his gun, points to his head and BANG!!!!!… shoots him in the head and kills him! He then moves to the ... Read More »

Is it an Emergency

The Boss who was on the 25th floor of the building called up one of his blonde clerk on the ground floor for an important file. Since it was rather urgent the Boss told the clerk it was an emergency and that she should hurry with the file. After more than 30 minutes the blonde appears all tired and panting ... Read More »

Food for Thought

An old lady, a difficult independent, use to sit on a bench in a park to feed the pigeons. One day, she brought with her a whole bun of fresh bread just to feed her daily company. Little by little, pinch by pinch, she fed each pigeon with joy. Then suddenly a man in his early 40s, who was watching ... Read More »

Why?

Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn’t wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn’t wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, “Happy birthday, boss!” I felt so special. She asked me out ... Read More »

Got tired

There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away. The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died. The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died. The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back. Read More »

Dream

Wife: “In my dream, I saw you in a jewelry store and you bought me a diamond ring.” Husband: “I had the same dream and I saw your dad paying the bill.” Read More »

Cat at school

The teacher asked Jimmy, “Why is your cat at school today Jimmy?” Jimmy replied crying, “Because I heard my daddy tell my mommy, ‘I am going to eat that p*ssy once Jimmy leaves for school today!'” Read More »

WW, WA, and ATR

A guy walks into a bathroom, sits down, and notices three buttons in front of him marked, WW, WA, and ATR. Curiosity gets the better of him so he decides to press WW. Suddenly, warm water sprays up his rear. “Mmmm,” he says to himself. “That was good.” So he presses WA and a jet of warm air dries his ... Read More »

Pronunciation

A husband and wife were driving through Louisiana. As they approached Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth, then they stopped for lunch. At the counter, the husband asked the blonde waitress, “Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are very slowly?” ... Read More »

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