Animal Jokes | Hot Jokes

Do you mind?

A man standing at a bus stop was eating a hamburger. Next to him stood a lady with her little dog, which became very excited at the smell of the man’s supper and began whining and jumping up at him. The man noticed this, in fact he was getting rather annoyed at the dog. “Do […] More

Predict the Weather

To tell the weather, go to your back door and look for the dog. If the dog is at the door and he is wet, it’s probably raining. But if the dog is standing there really soaking wet, it is probably raining really hard. If the dog’s fur looks like it’s been rubbed the wrong […] More

Sticky Hair?

Rabbit is hopping along the forest one day, when he comes upon Bear taking a dump. Bear says, “Rabbit, do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?” Rabbit replies, “No Bear, I don’t. Why do you ask?” So Bear grabs Rabbit and wipes his a$$ with him. More

Where’s Susie

A little girl asked her mom, “Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?” Her mom says, “No, because the dog is in heat.” “What’s that mean?” asked the child. “Go ask your father. I think he’s in the garage.” The little girl goes to the garage and says, “Dad, can […] More

Very stressful job

Nurse: Your blood pressure is amazingly high. Is your job very stressful? Patient: Well, I work at a petting zoo. Nurse: That seems easy enough. Patient: I determine which animals are too vicious to be petted. More

Plural of “Mongoose”

A zookeeper wanted to get some extra animals for his zoo, so he decided to compose a letter. The only problem was that he didn’t know the plural of “Mongoose.” He started the letter: “To whom it may concern, I need two Mongeese.” No, that won’t work. He tried again: “To whom it may concern, […] More

Lion`s Green Card

In a poor zoo of India, a lion was frustrated as he was offered not more than 1 kg meat a day. The lion thought its prayers were answered when one US Zoo Manager visited the zoo and requested the zoo management to shift the lion to the US Zoo. The lion was so happy […] More

The small rabbit

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, ‘Can I also sit like you and do nothing?’The eagle answered: ‘Sure, why not.’ So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the […] More