Doctor Jokes

Subterms

Latest stories

  • Footsteps

    While going out for a ride with his young daughter, a doctor notices the little girl playing with his stethoscope. He becomes excited, thinking “My daughter is going to follow in my footsteps!” The girl speaks into the stethoscope like a microphone, “Welcome to Burger King, may I take your order please?” More

  • Consciousness

    A man wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot. The doctor comes in and says, “Ah, I see you’ve regained consciousness. Now, you probably won’t remember, but you were in a pile up on the freeway. You’re going to be okay, you’ll walk again and everything, but something happened. I’m trying to […] More

  • Dentist

    A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl’s place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes of his trousers and washes his hands again. The girl has been watching him […] More

  • A Secret Dental Affair

    Laura fell for her handsome new dentist like a ton of bricks and pretty soon had lured him into a series of passionate rendezvous in the dental clinic after hours. But one day he said sadly, “Laura, honey, we have to stop seeing each other. Your husband’s bound to get suspicious.” “No way, sweetie, he’s […] More

  • A trip to the dentist…

    A woman phoned her dentist when she received a huge bill. “I’m shocked!” she complained. “This is three times what you normally charge.” “Yes, I know,” said the dentist. “But you screamed so loudly, you scared away two other patients.” More

  • The Breathalyzer Test

    A policeman pulls over a driver for swerving in and out of lanes on the highway. He tells the guy to blow a breath into a breathalyzer. “I can’t do that, officer.” “Why not?” “Because I’m an asthmatic. I could get an asthma attack if I blow into that tube.” “Okay, we’ll just get a […] More

  • Problem With Women

    “Doc,” said the young man lying down on the couch, “You’ve got to help me! Every night I have the same horrible dream. I’m lying in bed when all of a sudden five women rush in and start tearing off my clothes.” The psychiatrist nodded, “And what do you do?” “I push them away!” “I […] More

  • Silent and Odourless Farts!

    A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, “Doctor I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn’t bother me too much. “My farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I’ve farted at least 20 times since I’ve been here in your office. You didn’t know I […] More

  • Hospital Trolley

    A beautiful young girl is about to undergo a minor operation. She’s laid on a hospital trolley bed with nothing on, except a sheet over her. The nurse pushes the trolley down the corridor towards the operating theatre, where she leaves the girl on the trolley outside, while she goes in to check whether everything […] More

  • The Dentist

    The dentist pulls out a Novocain needle to give the man a shot, so he can extract the man’s tooth. ‘No way! No needles. I hate needles’ the patient said. The dentist starts to hook up the nitrous oxide and the man objects I can’t do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas […] More

  • Wristbands !

    In Korea, when a patient is taken to hospital, a white wristband is placed on their left arm. These wristbands contain the patient’s name and information. When a patient dies, a red wristband is placed on their right arm and they are taken to the morgue. In one particular hospital in Korea, a young doctor […] More

  • How Do They Do It

    A dentist was getting ready to clean an elderly lady’s teeth. He noticed that she was a little nervous, so he began to tell her a story as he was putting on his surgical gloves… “Do you know how they make these rubber gloves?” She said, “No?” “Well”, he spoofed, “down in Mexico they have […] More

Load More
Congratulations. You've reached the end of the internet.