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Young and beautiful

A man and his wife received a letter from their daughter who went to study overseas: My beloved Parents, I miss you so much. I don’t know when I’m coming home, but it seems not anytime soon. It breaks my heart to think that by the time I get back you’ll be too old. So enclosed you will find a ... Read More »

I Want This Done Right

A man with a piece of paper in his hand comes into an office where another man is sitting next to a shredding machine. “Do you know how to operate this thing?” he asks. “I have an important paper here and I want to make sure this is done right.” “Sure,” the other man answers. “Just put the paper in ... Read More »

Don’t Step on the Ducks

Three guys die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, “We only have one rule here in heaven: Don’t step on the ducks!” So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their ... Read More »

Starting At 8:05

A friend and I were golfing one day when at the 18th hole this guy comes out of nowhere and asks if he could join us. I tell him, “Well, we’re just about done but if you want to join us tomorrow you can. We start at 8 o’clock.” He said, “Great! I’ll be here at 8 o’clock, maybe 8:05…” ... Read More »

Sister in law

I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law ... Read More »

Twins

A man was driving along the highway, and saw a rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of the car and was hit. The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road and got ... Read More »

Calling the Last Rites

A man is struck by a bus on a busy street in New York City. He lies dying on the sidewalk as a crowd of spectators gathers around. “A priest! Somebody get me a priest!” the man gasps. A policeman checks the crowd but finds no priest, no minister, no man of God of any kind. “A PRIEST, PLEASE!” the ... Read More »

Almost every night

A 70-year-old man has never been married. One day, he meets a beautiful 17-year-old girl, and it is love at first sight. They get married and go to Florida for their honeymoon. When they get back, his friend says to him, “So, tell me, how was it?” “Oh, it was beautiful,” says the man. “The sun, the surf, we made ... Read More »

Effects of alcohol

A biology teacher wished to demonstrate to his students the harmful effects of alcohol on living organisms. For his experiment, he showed them a beaker with pond water in which there was a thriving civilization of worms. When he added some alcohol into the beaker the worms doubled-up and died. “Now,” he said,” what do you learn from this?” An ... Read More »

Little Pete

Little Pete came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn clothing. It was obvious he’d been in a bad fight and lost. While his father was patching him up, he asked his son what happened. “Well, Dad,” said Pete, “ I challenged Larry to a duel. And, you know, I gave him his choice of ... Read More »

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