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Who’s been?

A man walks into a crowded local bar brandishing a revolver yelling “Who’s been screwing my wife?” A voice from the back of the bar shouts back, “You don’t have enough ammo, mate!” Read More »

Learning From Teachers

Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school. Her marks were good…mostly A’s and a couple of B’s. However, her teacher had written across the bottom: “Sally is a smart little girl, but she has one fault. She talks too much in school. I have an idea I am going to try, which I think may break her of ... Read More »

No waves

A wealthy gentleman is taking a sea voyage around the world. After the first night at sea he walks onto the deck and says to the captain, “The sea is so calm. No waves at all. Why has the ship been wobbling the whole night.” “We’ve got five couples of newly-weds on board…” Read More »

Condo of their dreams

The middle-aged married couple finally moved into the Condo of their dreams, but right next door to a very sexy fashion model. The husband had taken to borrowing this or that from their neighbor and it seemed to the wife that it always took him way too long to return. One time the wife had had enough and actually pounded ... Read More »

Know nothing

At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl. Immediately he began paying her court and flattering her outrageously. The girl liked the young man, but she was taken a bit aback by his fast and ardent pitch. She was amazed when after 30 minutes he seriously proposed marriage. “Look,” she said. “We only met a ... Read More »

Man of this house

A mild-mannered man was tired of being bossed around by his wife, so he went to a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem and gave him a book on assertiveness, which he read on the way home. He had finished the book by the time he reached his house. The man stormed into the house and ... Read More »

Anything I can do?

A doctor told his patient that his test results indicated that she had a rare disease and had only six months to live. “That’s such a short amount of time, doctor. Isn’t there anything I can do?” pleaded the patient. “Marry a lawyer,” the doctor advised. “It will be the longest six months of your life.” Read More »

Feelings

A woman is breaking up with her fiance. She tells him, “I can’t marry you. My feelings for you have changed.” The man says, “OK, I want my ring back.” The woman says, “I can’t give it back to you. My feelings for the ring haven’t changed”. Read More »

NOT to say!

What NOT to say on your wedding night… 1. You woke me up for that? 2. Sweetheart, did you lock the back door? 3. Are you sure I don’t know you from somewhere? Read More »

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