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That’s How Mary Did It

Wife: What are your plans for Easter? Husband: Same as Jesus… Wife: What do you mean? Husband: I will disappear on Friday and reappear on Monday! On hearing that the wife retorts,”AWESOME, you do that, I’ll do a Mary and show up pregnant untouched by my husband.” The man stayed home. Read More »

Just a Wild Guess !

It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. The florist’s son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, “I bet I know what it is. Some flowers.” “That’s right” the boy said, “but how did you know?” “Oh, just a wild guess,” she said. ... Read More »

First Day of School

Billy was excited about his first day at school. So excited in fact, that only a few minutes after class started, he realised that he desperately needed to go to the toilet. So Billy raised his hand politely to ask if he could be excused. Of course, the teacher said yes, but asked Billy to be quick. Five minutes later. ... Read More »

Marriage vs Love

Love is holding hands in the street, Marriage is holding arguments in the street. Love is dinner for 2 in your favorite restaurant, Marriage is a take-home packet. Love is watching a movie on a sofa, Marriage is one of them sleeping on a sofa. Love is talking about having children, Marriage is talking about getting away from children. Love ... Read More »

How You Earned It!

A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, “Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel. “I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end ... Read More »

Fire up

A husband exclaims to his wife one day, “Your butt is getting really big. It’s bigger than the BBQ grill!” Later that night in bed, the husband makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. “What’s wrong?” he asks. She answers, “Do you really think I’m going to fire up this big-as̩s̩ grill for one little weenie?” Read More »

Multi-syllable words

Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, “Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?” Sarah waves her hand, “Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!” Miss Rogers says, “All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?” Sarah says, “Mas-tur-bate.” Miss Rogers smiles and says, “Wow, Sarah, that’s a mouthful.” Sarah ... Read More »

Man and his Curse

A man has a curse, he is only able to say a single word every year. But if he doesn’t say a word that year he can say two the next year, then three, and so on. One day he meets a beautiful woman and wants to ask her to marry him, but he has no words saved up so ... Read More »

FBI Agent

A rancher was minding his own business when an FBI agent came up up to him and said, “We got a tip that you may be growing illegal drugs on the premises. Do you mind if I take a look around?” The old rancher replied, “That’s fine, you shouldn’t go over there though.” As he pointed at one of his ... Read More »

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