2014

Yearly Archives

Latest stories

  • Monkey Business

    A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race appear?” The mother answered, “God made Adam and Eve and they had children and then all mankind was made.” Two days later the girl asked her father the same question. The father answered, “Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race […] More

  • Biggest Lie

    The priest was passing a group of young teens sitting on the church lawn and stopped to ask what they were doing. “Nothing much, father,” replied one boy. “We were just seeing who can tell the biggest lie about their s*x life.” “Boys, boys, boys!” he scolded. “I’m shocked. When I was your age, I […] More

  • Must help

    Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. “Boss,” he says, “we’re doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff.” “We’re short-handed, Smith” the boss replies. “I can’t give you the day off.” “Thanks, boss,” says Smith […] More

  • Just Pull the Plug…

    A man and his wife were sitting in the living room. Husband, “Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug.” His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all of his […] More

  • What do you suggest

    A New York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates.  Saint Peter asks him “What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?” The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, “A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street.”  Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in […] More

  • Too fast !!

    A snail was moving along the beach when he happened to look back behind him and saw three turtles wearing leather jackets. After moving along for about four weeks, the snail looked back again and saw that the three turtles were still there and closing in on him. So, the snail picked up his pace. […] More

  • The circle

    One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck’s driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not […] More

  • Comfortable

    A blonde and a brunette decide to start a farm together. They add up their life savings into a total of $200.00.Then, the blonde decided to purchase a bull with it. The brunette agrees, and so the brunette leaves to go find the perfect bull. When she does she is to telegram the blonde and […] More

  • Hey Hey

    Jack strode into ‘John’s Stable’ looking to buy a horse. “Listen here” said John, “I’ve got just the horse your looking for, the only thing is, he was trained by an interesting fellow. He doesn’t go and stop the usual way. The way to get him to stop is to scream “heyhey” the way to […] More

  • The king

    A servant enrolled his donkey in a race & won. The local paper read: ‘SERVANT’s A*S WON’. The king was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the servant to get rid of the donkey. He gave the donkey to the queen. The local paper then read:”QUEEN HAS THE BEST A*S IN TOWN”. […] More

  • Serious Patient

    A well-respected surgeon was relaxing on his sofa one evening just after arriving home from work. As he was tuning into the evening news, the phone rang. The doctor calmly answered it, and heard the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line. “We need a fourth for poker,” said the […] More

  • Polishing Apples!

    A young man asked a rich old man how he made his money. The old guy said: Son, it was 1932, the depth of the Great Depression I was down to my last nickel. I invested that in an apple and spent the entire day polishing it. At the end of the day, I sold […] More

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