2014

Yearly Archives

Latest stories

  • Kids, what does..

    Teacher: “Kids, what does the chicken give you?” Student: “Meat!” Teacher: “Very good! Now what does the pig give you?” Student: “Bacon!” Teacher: “Great! And what does the fat cow give you?” Student: “Homework!” More

  • Knock knock

    Three old ladies are sitting in a diner, chatting about various things. One lady says, “You know, I’m getting really forgetful. This morning, I was standing at the top of the stairs, and I couldn’t remember whether I had just come up or was about to go down.” The second lady says, “You think that’s […] More

  • Magician

    A guy wants to become a magician so he goes out and buys a magician book. Later he gathers his family around the living room for his first trick. Reading his new book he reaches into a bag and pulls out a hammer and to the amazement of his family hits himself in the head […] More

  • Growing Tomatoes

    A beautiful woman loved growing tomatoes, but couldn’t seem to get her tomatoes to turn red. One day, while taking a stroll, she came upon a gentleman neighbor who had the most beautiful garden full of huge red tomatoes. The woman asked the gentlemen,”What do you do to get your tomatoes so red?” The gentlemen […] More

  • Passing A Parrot

    A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, “Hey lady, you are really ugly.” Well, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. On the way home she saw the same […] More

  • Drinking Problem

    Fred was having trouble with a drinking problem and swore that he would correct it with sheer willpower. He had decided to walk straight past the pub without going in. As he approached the doors he kept repeating to himself, “You can do it. You can do it.” The pressure was tough, but Fred persevered, […] More

  • Lickety-split

    The businesswoman, in town for an important meeting, checked into her room at the swank hotel and unpacked her bags. Noticing that her best suit had been badly wrinkled during her flight, she telephoned the desk and asked the hotel’s valet service to pick it up for pressing. Almost immediately after she hung up the […] More

  • Cuckoo Clock

    At about 3AM, I was drunk as a skunk. I came home just in time to hear the cuckoo clock cuckoo three times. Quickly coming up with a plan, I cuckooed nine more times, hoping my wife would think it was midnight. I was very proud of myself. The next day, my wife asked what […] More

  • Cutting wood

    This fellow is looking to buy a saw to cut down some trees in his backyard. He goes to a chainsaw shop and asks about various chainsaws. The dealer tells him, “Look, I have a lot of models, but why don’t you save yourself a lot of time and aggravation and get the top-of-the-line model. […] More

  • Don’t Mess with Kids

    An atheist was seated next to a little girl on an airplane and he turned to her and said, “Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.” The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total stranger, “What would […] More

  • Be strong honey

    A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns, and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. He ties the girl to the bed and he gets on top […] More

  • Wedding night

    A guy on his wedding night in the hotel says to his new wife “geez, I never realized you had such big breasts.” The wife gets all upset and throws him out. While he is sitting in the hall another guy comes out down the hall. “What happened?” asks the first man. “Well” replies the […] More

Load More
Congratulations. You've reached the end of the internet.