2017

Yearly Archives

Latest stories

  • New secretary…

    A guy walked into his friend’s office, he found him sitting at his desk, looking very depressed. “Hey, what’s up with you?”, he asks. “Oh, its my wife,” replied the man sadly. “She’s hired a new secretary for me.” “Well, nothing wrong in that. Is she blonde or brunette?” “Neither, He’s bald.” More

  • Infrequently

    An elderly couple who are both widowed have been courting for a long time. They decide it’s finally time to get married. Before the wedding, they go out to dinner and talk about how their marriage might work. They discuss finances, living arrangements and so on. Finally, the man broaches the subject of their physical […] More

  • How retired folks stay happy and occupied

    Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for example, the other day, Mary my wife and I went into town and visited a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. We […] More

  • Peanuts

    A tour bus driver is driving with a bus load of seniors down a highway when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. After about 15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another […] More

  • The Umbrella

    A 90-year-old man said to his doctor, “I’ve never felt better. I have an 18-year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that?” The doctor considered his question for a minute and then said, “I have an elderly friend who is a hunter and never misses a season. One day […] More

  • Try To Spell That Name

    A traffic Policeman recently stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name. She said, “I’m Mrs. Chadivaler Zuminskagia Ragretumunga from the Republic of Uzbetikan visiting my sister in Columbia.” As she finished speaking the cop paused for a moment and then put away his summons book and pen, […] More

  • Send my luggage

    Passenger to Airline Ticket Agent: I want my brown suitcase sent to Los Angeles, my green suitcase sent to Kansas City, and my tan suitcase sent to New Orleans. Ticket Agent: I’m sorry, sir; this flight is to Nashville. We can’t do that. Passenger: Why not ? You did it last time. More

  • The Lord Will Save Me!

    It rained for days and days and there was a terrific flood. The water rose so high that one man was forced to climb on top of his roof and sat in the rain. As the waters came up higher a man in a rowboat came up to the house and told him to get […] More

  • The penguin

    A guy found a penguin and showed him to a policeman. The policeman said, “Take that penguin to the zoo, now.” Next day the policeman sees the man with the penguin again. The policeman stops the guy and says, I told you yesterday to take the penguin to the Zoo, what on earth are you […] More

  • Drunk driver?

    A cop waited outside a popular pub hoping to nab a drink-driver. At closing time, as everyone came out, he spotted his potential quarry. The man was so obviously inebriated that he could barely walk. He stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes looking for his car. After trying his keys on five […] More

  • A little boy sits on Santa’s

    A little boy sits on Santa’s lap. Santa says, “I bet I know what you want for Christmas,” and with his finger he taps the boys nose with every letter he spells “T-O-Y-S.” The little boy thinks a second and says, “No, I have enough toys.” Santa replies once again tapping the boys nose with […] More

  • Degrees…

    The graduate with a science degree asks, ‘Why does it work?’ The graduate with an engineering degree asks, ‘How does it work?’ The graduate with an accounting degree asks, ‘How much will it cost?’ The graduate with a liberal arts degree asks, ‘Do you want fries with that?’ More

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