2017

Yearly Archives

Latest stories

  • Guess who’s the bride

    A young Jewish man excitedly tells his mother he’s fallen in love and that he is going to get married. He says, “Just for fun, Ma, I’m going to bring over three women and you try and guess which one I’m going to marry.” The mother agrees. The next day, he brings three beautiful women […] More

  • Lawyers Don’t Lie

    A lawyer had a wife and 12 children and needed to move as his rental agreement was coming to an end for the home where he lived but was having difficulty in finding a new home. When he said he had 12 children, no one would rent a home to him because they knew that […] More

  • Texan in Hell

    A Texan dies and goes to Hell. Like with all new arrivals, Satan enjoys messing with the Texan. First, Satan turns the thermostat to 100 degrees with 80% humidity. Satan goes to check on the Texan only to become angry when he sees the Texan reclining in a lawn chair, sipping iced tea saying, “This […] More

  • I wish..

    Two men were walking down the street when they saw a dog licking himself. One man said “I wish I could do that.” The other man said “you should probably just pet him first.” More

  • Snail on the porch…

    A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. […] More

  • Buying a horse

    Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horses legs and rump, and chest.. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, “Dad, why are you doing that?” His father replied, “Because when I am buying horses, I have […] More

  • Screwed

    A man walks into a bar and sees a good-looking woman sitting on a stool. He walks up to her and says, “Hi there, how’s it going?” She turns to him, looks deep into his eyes and says, “I’ll screw anybody, any time, anywhere, your place, my place, it doesn’t matter.” He says, “No kidding! […] More

  • PHD

    Two old friends crossed paths after not seeing one another for almost a decade. Utkarsh: “What are you doing these days?” Sparsh: “PHD.” Utkarsh: “Wow! You’re a doctor!” Sparsh: “No, Pizza Home Delivery.” More

  • Constipated Worker

    A construction worker tells his doctor, “I’m constipated.” The doctor examines him for a few minutes and says, “Lean over the table.” After he does so, the doctor whacks him on his ass, with a baseball bat. A loud “CRACK!” is heard, and the doctor sends the man to the bathroom. After coming out of […] More

  • The Impatient Flea

    Tired of waiting in the back of the line to get on Noah’s Ark, a flea jumps from one animal to another as she moves closer to the front. She leaps and leaps until she lands on the back of an elephant. The pachyderm turns to its mate and says testily, “I knew it! Here […] More

  • How were people born?

    A child asked his father, “How were people born?” So his father said, “Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on.” The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, “We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we […] More

  • Overheard At The Fair…

    Little girl: I want cotton candy! Mom: You can have some cotton candy after you eat something 
healthy. Little girl: I want cotton candy now! Mom: I said no, you’re going to have something healthy! How about a corn dog? More

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