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  • Idea of marrying..

    A young man proposes marriage to his sweetheart. The girl replies, “If I marry you, will you promise to give up smoking?” “Yes, I will,” came the reply. “And drinking?” “I will give up drinking as well.” “And going to the club with your cronies?” “Yes, I will.” “And what else will you give up […] More

  • Does a lawyer…

    A young boy walked up to his father and asked, “Dad? Does a lawyer ever tell the truth?” The father thought for a moment. “Yes son,” he replied, “Sometimes a lawyer will do anything to win a case.” More

  • Thank you!

    A teenager who had just received her learner’s permit for driving offered to drive her parents to church. After a hair-raising ride, they finally reached their destination. “Thank you!” said the mother as she got out of the car and breathed a sigh of relief. “Anytime,” her daughter replied. As the mother closed the door […] More

  • Fishing secrets

    There was a competition between a team of blondes and a team of brunettes to see who could catch the most fish ice fishing. Once the contest started, it was clear that the brunettes were going to win, they kept pulling out fish after fish. Soon, the blondes got worried and sent over one of […] More

  • Footprint

    A man sitting at a lunch counter has just been served his food when he calls the waiter back. “Waiter,” he says, “can you explain why there is a footprint in the middle of this food that I ordered?” “Yes, sir,” replies the waiter. “You rushed in here, asked for a large omelet and told […] More

  • Lottery

    Two old married men chatting in a bar. First man says, “Have you ever thought that marriage was a bit of a lottery?” The second man replied, “Not at all. At least you have a slight chance with a lottery.” More

  • Friend call

    After being with a new girl all evening, the man couldn’t take another minute with her. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave if something like this happened. When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on […] More

  • Think!

    In the men’s room at work, the Boss had placed a sign directly above the sink. It had a single word on it — “Think!” The next day, when he went to the men’s room, he looked at the sign and right below, immediately above the soap dispenser, someone had carefully lettered another sign which […] More

  • The Usual Tip

    Johnny paid his way through college by being a waiter in a restaurant. “What’s the usual tip?” asked a customer. “Well,” said Johnny, “this is my first day, but the other guys said that, if I got five dollars out of you, I’d be doing great.” “Is that so?” growled the customer. “In that case, […] More

  • Don’t move until..

    A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. “Hurry!” she said, “stand in the corner.” She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. “Don’t move until I tell you to,” she whispered. “Just pretend you’re a statue.” “What’s […] More

  • Brown eyes cheat

    A man was talking to his friend at the bar. The friend said, “Did you know that 9 out of 10 women with brown eyes cheat on their husbands?” “No, I didn’t know that,” The man replied. “So what color are your wife’s eyes?” asked the friend. The man replied, “I’m too drunk to remember. […] More

  • Following orders

    Doctor: I see you’re over a month late for your appointment. Don’t you know that nervous disorders require prompt and regular attention? What’s your excuse? Patient: I was just following your orders, Doc. Doctor: Following my orders? What are you talking about? I gave you no such order. Patient: You told me to avoid people […] More

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