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  • Welcome to the Family

    A man went to meet his father in law to be and was chewing gum. The father in law shouted at him in a harsh voice. Father-in-law: Young man, you’re coming to seek my daughter’s hand in marriage and you’re chewing gum. That’s a sign of disrespect! Man: Sir, I only chew gum when I […] More

  • Maternity Ward

    Father: (at the hospital looking through the glass at the newly arrived babies) “Kitchy kitchy koo. Look, she smiled! Isn’t she adorable?” Friend: “But your kid didn’t smile.” Father: “I was talking about the nurse. More

  • Lost credit card

    A man says to his friend: “My wife’s credit card got stolen last week.” “That’s a shame,” says the friend: “have you told the police?” “No way,” says the man: “the thief is spending less than she did!” More

  • The Big Trouble

    The henpecked plumber rang the bell. The master and the mistress of the house came to the door together. As they all three stood in the hall, the husband, a methodical man, announced, “I wish, before you go upstairs, to acquaint you with my trouble.” The plumber shyly dropped his eyes. “Pleased to meet yer, […] More

  • Two-timer

    Mrs. Donnell said to her maid: “Oh Mary, I suspect that my husband is having an affair with his secretary.” “I don’t believe it,” Mary snapped: “you’re just saying that to make me jealous.” More

  • Parking Enforcement

    I went to the shop the other day. I was only in there for about 5 minutes and when I came out, there was a damn traffic officer writing a parking ticket for over-running the meter. So I went up to him and said, “Come on, how about giving a man a break?” He ignored […] More

  • 9 Months Later

    Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack’s minivan and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered he door if they could spend the night. “I realize […] More

  • Worms

    Little Johnny watched the science teacher start the experiment with the worms. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a jar of sperm. The fourth worm was […] More

  • Two Roaches Discussion

    Two roaches were munching on garbage in an alley when one engages a discussion about a new restaurant. “I was in that new restaurant across the street,” said one. “It’s so clean! The kitchen is spotless, and the floors are gleaming white. There is no dirt anywhere–it’s so sanitary that the whole place shines.” Cockroach […] More

  • Little Billy

    Little Billy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, USA, they decided to send it to President Bush. The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his […] More

  • Last words

    There were these three women. One blonde, one red, and one brunet. They were all about to be shot. One by one. When the brunet came up, the man asked “Do you have any last words before you die?” The brunet said “No.” Then the man said, “Ok. Ready, aime…” then before the man could […] More

  • How many?

    Wife asks husband, “How many women have you slept with?” Husband proudly replies, “Only you, Darling – With all the others, I was awake.” Hospital Visiting Hours are 10 am to 4 PM More

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