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  • A Little Pain

    The new priest was hosting a meeting in the church of the young candidates for First Communion, with their parents. Now, this church had some magnificent stained glass windows, so his message centered on how each of us is called to help make up the whole picture of life, i.e. the life of the community […] More

  • Calling the Last Rites

    A man is struck by a bus on a busy street in New York City. He lies dying on the sidewalk as a crowd of spectators gathers around. “A priest! Somebody get me a priest!” the man gasps. A policeman checks the crowd but finds no priest, no minister, no man of God of any […] More

  • Borrowed the Car

    After shopping for most of the day, a couple returns to find their car has been stolen. They go to the police station to make a full report. Then, a detective drives them back to the parking lot to see if any evidence can be found at the scene of the crime. To their amazement, […] More

  • Chocolate Chip Cookies

    An old man was lying on his deathbed. With only hours to live, he suddenly smelled chocolate chip cookies wafting up from the kitchen. Driven on by his favorite smell, he somehow managed to pull himself out of bed, across the floor to the stairs, and slowly down the stairs to the kitchen. There, the […] More

  • Watermelons

    There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was doing pretty well, but he was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his watermelon patch at night and eat his watermelons. After some careful thought, he came up with a clever idea that he thought would scare the kids away for sure. He […] More

  • Almost every night

    A 70-year-old man has never been married. One day, he meets a beautiful 17-year-old girl, and it is love at first sight. They get married and go to Florida for their honeymoon. When they get back, his friend says to him, “So, tell me, how was it?” “Oh, it was beautiful,” says the man. “The […] More

  • A Russian party-official

    A Russian party-official arrives late at night to his hotel (in Russia). He is not surprised to find that his reservation has been mislaid but he is more than a little peeved that his status in the party isn’t enough to get him a good room anyway. However, the clerk insists, the only bed they […] More

  • Say What?

    Teacher: “Here is an example of a tongue twister — Sally sells sixty-six shells by the sandy seashore… Now try saying that five times in a row fast!” Little Johnny: “That five times in a row fast!” More

  • A Day At The Races

    The man selling two-dollar tickets at Monmouth Racetrack registered complete surprise when a horse stepped up to the window and asked to bet on himself. “What’s the matter?” snorted the horse. “Are you astonished that I can talk?” “Not at all,” said the man. “I’m surprised that you think you can win.” More

  • Little Pete

    Little Pete came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn clothing. It was obvious he’d been in a bad fight and lost. While his father was patching him up, he asked his son what happened. “Well, Dad,” said Pete, “ I challenged Larry to a duel. And, you know, I […] More

  • Life..

    In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen. More

  • Some Last Minute Requests

    A man woke up in a hospital bed and called for his doctor. He asked, “Give it to me straight. How long have I got?” The physician replied that he doubted that the man would survive the night. The man then said, “Call for my lawyer.” When the lawyer arrived, the man asked for his […] More

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