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  • Panic at the hotel…

    It was three o’clock in the morning, and the receptionist at a posh hotel was just dozing off, when a little old lady came running towards her, screaming. “Please come quickly,” she yelled, “I just saw a naked man outside my window!” The receptionist immediately rushed up to the old lady’s room. “Where is he?” […] More

  • Old age stamina

    Two old guys, one 80 and one 87 were sitting on their usual park bench one morning. The 87-year-old had just finished his morning jog and wasn’t even short of breath. The 80-year-old was amazed at his friend’s stamina and asked him what he did to have so much energy. The 87-year-old said, “Well, I […] More

  • A Birthday Wish

    Little Sonia was shouting her prayers. “Please God send me a new doll for my birthday.” Her mother, overhearing this, said, “Don’t shout dear, God isn’t deaf.” “No, but Grandad is, and he’s in the next room,” Sonia replied. More

  • Tips from the holy man

    A group of boys were going to confession one sunday. The first boy, John, says: Father, I’ve done something terrible. What have you done, John? I fu**ed a girl. Who was it? I can’t tell you, father, she would never permit it. Well, John, was it Mary M? No, father, I can’t tell you. Was […] More

  • The juggler

    A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police. “What are these matches and lighter fluid doing in your car?” asks the cop. “I’m a juggler and I juggle flaming torches in my act.” “Oh yeah?” says the doubtful cop. “Lets see you do it.” The juggler gets out and starts juggling […] More

  • Dealing with bribes

    Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faced the opposing lawyers. “So,” he said, “I have been presented, by both of you, with a bribe.” Both lawyers squirmed uncomfortably. “You, attorney Leon, gave me $15,000. And you, attorney Campos, gave me $10,000.” The judge reached into his pocket and pulled out a check. He […] More

  • Wife’s love

    Bill pulled up a stool at his favorite bar and announced: “My wife Suzie must love me more than any woman has ever loved any man!” “What makes you say that?” the bartender inquired. “Last week,” Bill explained, “I had to take a couple of sick days from work. Suzie was so thrilled to have […] More

  • Technology HURTS…

    A wife was calling out for her husband from the kitchen to help her with the dishes, but did not get a response. She went looking for him in the bed room and found hubby asleep on his files, tired of work. She walked closer to him, looked at the innocent face, played with his […] More

  • College Pride

    A girl goes into the doctor’s office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red ‘H’ on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” asks the doctor. “Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he’s so proud of it he never takes off his Harvard sweat […] More

  • A part in the play

    A young lad’s father picked him up from school to take him to a dental appointment. Knowing the parts for the school play were supposed to be posted today, he asked his son if he got a part. The boy enthusiastically announced that he’d gotten a part. “I play a man who’s been married for […] More

  • New formula

    A famous scientist developed a formula to bring statues to life. He went to a local park to try it out on a statue of Gen. Ulysses Grant. After application, Gen Grant began to move and soon was completely alive. The scientist asked, “What’s the first thing you’ll do, General?” The general answered while drawing […] More

  • A pain in the leg…

    An old man goes to his doctor, complaining about a pain in his leg that doesn’t heal, and wants a diagnosis and explanation. The doctor checks out his leg, but can’t find anything wrong, so he gives the old guy a full physical exam, and still can’t come up with any possible explanation for the […] More

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