Animal Jokes | Hot Jokes

I Can Guess How Many

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie gets out and asks the shepherd, […] More

Bull’s Education

A tractor salesman was passing a farm, where the farmer was plowing the field with a bull. He goes over and offers to sell the farmer a tractor to plow with. The farmer tells him, “I don’t need a tractor, I have three new ones at the barn.” “Well if you have three new tractors […] More

Who stole your pig?

Farmer Josh killed a pig and hung it up for the night, intending to butcher it in the morning, but the next day it was gone. He didn’t tell a soul about it, and nothing happened for more than two months. Then another farmer, who lived down the road, came by and said, “By the […] More

Three mice

Three mice are sitting at a bar in a pretty rough neighborhood late at night trying to impress each other about how tough they are. The first mouse pounds a shot of scotch, slams the glass onto the bar, turns to the second mouse and says, “When I see a mousetrap, I lie on my […] More

Fast chicken

A man was driving along a rural road, one day, when he saw a three-legged chicken. He was amused enough to drive along side it for a while. As he was driving, he noticed the chicken was running 30 mph. “Pretty fast chicken,” he thought, “I wonder just how fast it can run.” So, he […] More

$5,000 bird

A successful businessman wanted to send his elderly mother a very special gift for her birthday, a rare South American endangered bird valued at $5,000. When he called his mother to see how she liked the surprise gift he was shocked when she said, “It was quite small, but tasted very good.” He asked her, […] More

Jesus is Watching!

A burglar has just made it into the house he’s intending ransacking, and he’s looking around for stuff to steal. All of a sudden, a little voice pipes up, “I can see you, and so can Jesus!” Startled, the burglar looks around the room. No one there at all, so he goes back to his […] More

Nice sheepy

A Montanan is driving down the road and suddenly sees this Californian hitch hiking. He pulls over offers him a lift and down the road they go. After a few miles they come across this sheep with its head stuck in a fence. The Montanan immediately pulls over and jumps out to check out the […] More