Joke of the day | Hot Jokes

Stop That

A very attractive young lady was sitting in a fine restaurant one night. Waiting for her date as she was, she wanted to make sure everything was perfect. So, as she bends down in her chair to get the mirror from her purse, she accidentally farts quite loudly just as the waiter walks up. Sitting […] More

American Pizza in Japan

An American businessman goes to Japan on a business trip, but he hates Japanese food, so he asks the concierge at his hotel if there’s any place around where he can get American food. The concierge tells him he’s in luck, there’s a pizza place that just opened, and they deliver. The concierge gives the […] More

Vaseline research

A woman answers the door to a market researcher. “Good morning madam, I’m doing some research for Vaseline. Do you use it at all in your household?” “Oh yes, all the time. It’s very good for cuts, grazes and burns.” “Do you use it for anything else?” “Like what?” “Ahem.. err.. well.. during.. ahem.. se […] More

Old lover

At 85 years of age, Morris married Lou Anne, a lovely 25 year old. Since her new husband is so old, Lou Anne decides that after their wedding she and Morris should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new but aged husband may overexert himself if they spend the entire night together. […] More

Two psychiatrists

Two psychiatrists had taken the evening off to have some fun and are enjoying a ride on a bike. They have an accident and one of them, who had taken a bad fall, in grievously injured, with cuts, bruises and a lot of bleeding. The other sits by his side and asks, “Do you want […] More

Always on Call

A doctor answers his phone and hears the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line. ‘We need a fourth for poker,’ said the friend. ‘I’ll be right over,’ whispered the doctor. As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, ‘Is it serious?’ ‘Oh yes, quite serious,’ said the […] More

Maths problem

Little Johnny was in Maths class when the teacher asked the class to solve a problem. The problem was like this: A rich man worth twenty million dollars dies. One fourth of his wealth goes to his wife, one third to his daughter, and one fifth to his nephew, and the rest is donated to […] More

Burglar

“Get this.” said the English bloke to his mates, “Last night while I was down the pub with you guys, a burglar broke into my house. “Did he get anything?” his mates asked. “yeah, a broken jaw, six teeth knocked out, and a pair of broken nuts. The wife thought it was me coming home […] More

Adam and Eve

Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands…. When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset. “You’re running around with other women,” she told her mate. “Eve, honey, you’re being unreasonable,” Adam responded. “You know you’re the only woman on earth.” The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to […] More

Complicated order..

A resident in a seaside hotel breakfast room called the head waiter to his table. “I want two boiled eggs, one of them so undercooked it’s runny, and the other so overcooked, it’s tough and hard to eat. Also, give me some grilled bacon that has been left on the plate to get cold; burnt […] More

My Wife Won’t Like it…

One day I accidentally overturned my golf cart. Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer who lived in a villa on the golf course we were living at in Sarasota, heard the noise and called out, “Are you okay, what’s your name?” “It’s Jack, and I’m OK thanks,” I replied. “Jack, forget your troubles. Come […] More

Orange

The professor of a contract law class asked one of his better students, “If you were to give someone an orange, how would you go about it?” The student replied, “Here’s an orange.” The professor was outraged. “No! No! Think like a lawyer!” The student then replied, “Okay. I’d tell him `I hereby give and […] More

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