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  • Animal Pictures

    One day the teacher decides to play an animal game. She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is. No one raises his/her hand. The teacher says “See it’s long neck? What animal has a long neck?” Sally holds up her hand and asks if it is a […] More

  • Special?

    A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahead of him in line to see St. Peter. To his surprise, St. Peter left his desk at the gate and came down the long line to where the lawyer was, and greeted him warmly. Then St. Peter […] More

  • Crossing The Border

    While crossing the US-Mexican border on his bicycle, the man was stopped by a guard who pointed to two sacks the man had on his shoulders. “What’s in the bags?”, asked the guard. “Sand,” said the cyclist. “Get them off – we’ll take a look,” said the guard. The Cyclist did as he was told, […] More

  • Just like dad…

    The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, “I’ve found a man just like Dad!” Her mother replied, “So what you want from me, sympathy?” More

  • Stay more..

    A man is driving with his wife at his side and his mother-in-law in the backseat. The women just won’t leave him alone. His mother-in-law says, “You’re driving too fast!” His wife says, “Stay more to the left.” After ten mixed orders, the man turns to his wife and asks, “Who’s driving this car – […] More

  • Footsteps

    While going out for a ride with his young daughter, a doctor notices the little girl playing with his stethoscope. He becomes excited, thinking “My daughter is going to follow in my footsteps!” The girl speaks into the stethoscope like a microphone, “Welcome to Burger King, may I take your order please?” More

  • Consciousness

    A man wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot. The doctor comes in and says, “Ah, I see you’ve regained consciousness. Now, you probably won’t remember, but you were in a pile up on the freeway. You’re going to be okay, you’ll walk again and everything, but something happened. I’m trying to […] More

  • Fig Leaf Found

    A little boy opened the large old family Bible, and he looked with fascination at the ancient pages as he turned them one by one. He was still in Genesis when something fell out of the Bible. He picked it up and looked at it closely. It was a very large old tree leaf that […] More

  • Not For Sale

    A picky lady customer at a Supermarket’s fruit department watches as a new delivery of fresh fruit is delivered. “Give me two kilo of oranges and wrap every orange in a separate piece of paper, please,” the picky lady says to the saleslady. Silently the sales lady serves the picky customer. “And three kilo of […] More

  • Raffle prizes…

    Bubba & Earl were in the local bar enjoying a beer when the decided to get in on the weekly charity raffle. They bought five tickets each at a dollar a pop. The following week, when the raffle was drawn, each had won a prize. Earl won 1st prize, a year’s supply of gourmet spaghetti […] More

  • Driveway

    A couple pulled into the driveway after their first date. The guy leans over and gives the girl a long, slow kiss. While he’s kissing her, he quietly unzips his pants, takes her hand, and puts it on his penis. When she realizes what it is, she screams, jumps out of the car, and yells […] More

  • Misbehaving

    Little Johnny had finished his summer vacation and gone back to school. Two days later his teacher phoned his mother to tell her that he was misbehaving. “Wait a minute,” she said. “I had Johnny with me for three months and I never called you once when he misbehaved. More

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