Miscellaneous Jokes

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  • Once upon a time

    Once upon a time Dracula decided to carry some sort of a competition to see which is the finest bat to stand on his side. So all the bats were honored to take part. The rules were simple. Whichever bat drinks more blood, will be the winner? So the first bat goes and comes back […] More

  • The Darwinian vs. God Contest

    One day a group of Darwinian scientists got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one Darwinian to go and tell Him that they were done with Him. The Darwinian walked up to God and said, “God, we’ve decided that we no longer need […] More

  • Afraid to cough

    John was a clerk in a small drugstore but he was not much of a salesman. He could never find the item the customer wanted. Bob, the owner, had about enough and warned John that the next sale he missed would be his last. Just then a man came in coughing and he ask John […] More

  • Who is in charge?

    Bill and Hilary were driving through Little Rock, and when they passed by a gas station a big man yelled ‘Hi Hilary’ and Hilary said ‘Hi Bubba’. Bill asked ‘who was that?’ And Hilary told him it was a old high school boyfriend. Bill said, ‘See if you married him you would be married to […] More

  • Breeding Bulls

    My wife and I went to the County Agricultural Show and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said: THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ….. Smiled […] More

  • First Date

    A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do? His mother had an idea: “Why don’t you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your apartment for a home-cooked meal?” He thought this was a great strategy, […] More

  • Keeping a Mistress!

    A Singapore millionaire secretly maintained a mistress in Hong Kong, bought a posh sea view apartment (in his own name) for her to live in, plus gave her a monthly allowance of US$5,000. The house cost him about US$700,000 in 2005, the affair lasted for 5 years. He sold the house this year for $3.8 […] More

  • Drunk Driving!!!

    This happened to an Englishman in France who was totally drunk. The French policeman stops his car and asks the gentleman if he has been drinking. With great difficulty, the Englishman admits that he has been drinking all day, that his daughter got married in the morning to a French man, and that he drank […] More

  • Free meat

    It was many years ago since the embarrassing day when a young woman, with a baby in her arms, entered his butcher shop and confronted the butcher with the news that the baby was his and asked what was he going to do about it? Finally he offered to provide her with free meat until […] More

  • Two guys are driving down 5th…

    Two guys are driving down 5th Avenue in Manhattan when they come up to a red light. The guy driving slams the gas pedal and they go zooming past the red light. His friend looks at him and says, “Hey, you just went through a red light.” The guy driving says, “Don’t worry about it. […] More

  • Two factory workers were talking..

    Two factory workers were talking. “I know how to get some time off fromwork.” said the man. “How do you think you will do that?” said the other one. He proceeded toshow her…by climbing up to the rafters, and hanging upside down. The boss walked in, saw the worker hanging from the ceiling, and asked […] More

  • When I Was Your Age …

    The minister was passing a group of young teens sitting on the church lawn and stopped to ask what they were doing. “Nothing much, Pastor,” replied one boy. “We were just seeing who can tell the biggest lie about their sex life.” “Boys, boys, boys!” he scolded. “I’m shocked. When I was your age, I […] More

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