Jokes of the day - Part 120

About Titanic

Recently a teacher, a garbage collector, and a lawyer wound up together at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter informed them that in order to get into Heaven, they would each have to answer one question. St. Peter addressed the teacher and asked, “What was the name of the ship that crashed into the iceberg? They […] More

They Got Mom!

My mother was away all weekend at a business conference. During a break, she decided to call home, collect. My six-year-old brother picked up the phone and heard a stranger’s voice say, “We have a Marcia on the line. Will you accept the charges?” Frantic, he dropped the receiver and came charging outside screaming, “Dad! […] More

Old Josh

Old Josh was sat in his garden, sunbathing in the deck chair when he noticed his grand-son kneeling on the lawn with a worm. When he asked his grandson what he was doing, he found that he was trying to push the worm down the hole from which it came. “If you can get that […] More

Thank goodness

A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, “I’ve got to take you in, pal. You’re obviously drunk.” Our wasted friend asked, “Officer, are ya absolutely sure I’m drunk?” “Yeah, buddy, I’m sure,” said the copper. […] More

Barber shop

President George Bush and President Barack Obama ended up at the barbershop at the same time. As they sat there, each being worked on by a different barber, not a word was spoken. The barbers were even afraid to start a conversation, for fear it would turn to politics. As the barbers finished their shaves, […] More

Taking It With You

Lying on his deathbed, the rich, miserly old man calls to his long-suffering wife. “I want to take all my money with me,” he tells her. “So promise me you’ll put it in the casket.” After the man dies, his widow attends the memorial service with her best friend. Just before the undertaker closes the […] More

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