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  • Scotch & Water

    A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, “I’m on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it’s today.” The bartender says, “Well, since it’s your birthday, I’ll buy you a drink. In fact, […] More

  • Little Johnny… fascinate

    A teacher asks her students to give her a sentence with the word “fascinate” in it. A little girl says, “Walt Disney World is fascinating.” The teacher says, “No, I said, ‘fascinate.’” Another little girl says, “There’s so much fascination when it comes to sea life.” The teacher again says, “No, the word is fascinate.” […] More

  • Clearly cheating

    A man cheats on his girlfriend Lorraine with a woman named Clearly. Lorraine dies suddenly. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, “I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone.” More

  • Pole Dancers!

    A guy meets a childhood pal. “What are you doing for yourself these days?” “I’m a fireman.” “Oh yeah? My 15-year-old kid wants to be a fireman.” “Well, if you want some good advice, you’ve got to install in your house a pole that will go to the base- ment so your kid can practice, […] More

  • Where Have You Been???

    A convicted felon was given ten years without parole for his latest crime. After 2 years in jail, he managed to escape. His escape was the lead item on the six o’clock news. Because he had to be careful, he worked his way home taking little travelled routes, running across deserted fields and taking every […] More

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