Jokes of the day

Old flame…

A couple was dining out when the wife noticed a familiar face at the bar. She recognized him as an old flame. “Honey,” she said to her husband, as she pointed out the man, “that guy at the bar has been drinking like that since I left him seven years ago.” Her husband said, “That’s […] More

Burglary Witness

An old man was a witness in a burglary case. The defense lawyer asked Sam, “Did you see my client commit this burglary?” “Yes,” said Sam, “I saw him plainly take the goods.” The lawyer asks Sam again, “Sam, this happened at night. Are you sure you saw my client commit this crime?” “Yes, says […] More

Nun Sees A Naked Man

A nun and a priest were traveling across the desert and realized halfway across that the camel they were using for transportation was about to die. They set up a make-shift camp, hoping someone would come to their rescue, but to no avail. Soon the camel died. After several days of not being rescued, they […] More

At least twice as large

A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, “Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large”. Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off […] More

Meals on Wheels

A cat died and went to heaven. St. Peter met the cat at the gate and said, “Welcome. Is there anything you didn’t have on Earth that I can get for you, here in Heaven?”. The cat thought for a moment and said, “Yes, I always had to sleep on a hard floor, could I […] More

I Lost My Car Keys

Several days ago as I left a meeting at a hotel; I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing. Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed […] More

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