Joke of the day
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Latest stories
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How old do you think I am?
A woman decides to have a facelift for her birthday. She spends $5,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home she stops at a newsstand to buy a paper. Before leaving, she asks the sales clerk, “I hope you don’t mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?” […] More
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The voice
I was in the public toilets and had just sat down, a voice from the next cubicle said “Hi!, how are you?” Embarrassed, I said, “I’m doing fine”. The voice said “So what are you up to?”. I said, “Just doing the same as you, sitting here!”. From next door, “Can I come over?”. Annoyed, […] More
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Grandma’s Home
When I stopped the bus to pick up Chris for preschool, I noticed an older woman hugging him as he left the house. “Is that your grandmother?” I asked. “Yes,” Chris said. “She’s come to visit us for Christmas.” “How nice,” I said. “Where does she live?” “At the airport,” Chris replied. “Whenever we want […] More
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A Child’s Prayer
While walking through the woods one day, I was surprised to hear a child’s voice. I followed the sound, trying in vain to understand the child’s words. When I spotted a girl perched on a rock, I realized why her words had made no sense: She was repeating the alphabet. “Why are you saying your […] More
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3rd patient
One morning at a doctor ‘s clinic a well built man arrives complaining of severe back pain, the doctor examines him and asks OK what happened to your back? The patient replies “you know that I … work as a bouncer for a local night club? This morning I got home to my apartment early and heard a noise in […] More
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Finding Her Place
On her way back from the theater sitting, a blonde asked a man at the end of the row, “Pardon me, but did I step on your foot a few minutes ago?” Man hoping for an apology said, “Indeed you did.” Blonde nodded, and said, “Oh good. Then this is my row.” More
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Crow Kills!
Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone’s relief, confirmed the problem was definitely not Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to […] More
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Pregnant With Twins
The other day my neighbor, came running up to me in the driveway jumping for joy! I didn’t know why she was jumping so excitedly but I thought, ‘What the heck,’, and I starting jumping up and down along with her. She said, “I have some really great news!” I said, “Great. Tell me why […] More