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  • Door To Door

    Two salesmen were going door to door, and knocked on the door of a woman who was not happy to see them. She told them in no uncertain terms that she did not want to hear their offer and slammed the door in their faces. To her surprise, however, the door did not close and, […] More

  • Stop That

    A very attractive young lady was sitting in a fine restaurant one night. Waiting for her date as she was, she wanted to make sure everything was perfect. So, as she bends down in her chair to get the mirror from her purse, she accidentally farts quite loudly just as the waiter walks up. Sitting […] More

  • Vaseline research

    A woman answers the door to a market researcher. “Good morning madam, I’m doing some research for Vaseline. Do you use it at all in your household?” “Oh yes, all the time. It’s very good for cuts, grazes and burns.” “Do you use it for anything else?” “Like what?” “Ahem.. err.. well.. during.. ahem.. se […] More

  • Old lover

    At 85 years of age, Morris married Lou Anne, a lovely 25 year old. Since her new husband is so old, Lou Anne decides that after their wedding she and Morris should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new but aged husband may overexert himself if they spend the entire night together. […] More

  • Two psychiatrists

    Two psychiatrists had taken the evening off to have some fun and are enjoying a ride on a bike. They have an accident and one of them, who had taken a bad fall, in grievously injured, with cuts, bruises and a lot of bleeding. The other sits by his side and asks, “Do you want […] More

  • Maths problem

    Little Johnny was in Maths class when the teacher asked the class to solve a problem. The problem was like this: A rich man worth twenty million dollars dies. One fourth of his wealth goes to his wife, one third to his daughter, and one fifth to his nephew, and the rest is donated to […] More

  • Burglar

    “Get this.” said the English bloke to his mates, “Last night while I was down the pub with you guys, a burglar broke into my house. “Did he get anything?” his mates asked. “yeah, a broken jaw, six teeth knocked out, and a pair of broken nuts. The wife thought it was me coming home […] More

  • Complicated order..

    A resident in a seaside hotel breakfast room called the head waiter to his table. “I want two boiled eggs, one of them so undercooked it’s runny, and the other so overcooked, it’s tough and hard to eat. Also, give me some grilled bacon that has been left on the plate to get cold; burnt […] More

  • My Wife Won’t Like it…

    One day I accidentally overturned my golf cart. Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer who lived in a villa on the golf course we were living at in Sarasota, heard the noise and called out, “Are you okay, what’s your name?” “It’s Jack, and I’m OK thanks,” I replied. “Jack, forget your troubles. Come […] More

  • Law Class!

    The professor of a contract law class asked one of his better students, “If you were to give someone an orange, how would you go about it?” The student replied, “Here’s an orange.” The professor was outraged. “No! No! Think like a lawyer!” The student then replied, “Okay. I’d tell him ‘I hereby give and […] More

  • Need a Break!

    I urgently needed a few days off work, but, I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that I would do something crazy. So I hung upside-down on the ceiling and made funny noises. Santa, my co-worker asked me what I was doing. I told him that I was pretending […] More

  • Having a Bad Day

    A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric socket. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she ran outside and grabbed a handy plank of wood and smacked him with it, […] More

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