St. Peter

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  • Meals on Wheels

    A cat died and went to heaven. St. Peter met the cat at the gate and said, “Welcome. Is there anything you didn’t have on Earth that I can get for you, here in Heaven?”. The cat thought for a moment and said, “Yes, I always had to sleep on a hard floor, could I […] More

  • Clocks

    Hillary Clinton died and went to Heaven. St. Peter was giving her a tour of Heaven when she noticed that there were dozens of clocks on the wall. Each clock displayed a different time of day. When she asked St. Peter about the clocks, he replied, ”We have a clock for each person on earth […] More

  • Bob, The Chicken

    Bob came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, “You died in your sleep, Bob.” Bob was stunned. “I’m dead? No, I can’t be! I’ve got too much to live for. Send me back! Please!” […] More