February 2016

Monthly Archives

Latest stories

  • Surprising the cow

    The farmer and his wife are entertaining the local bigwigs when their son runs in and announces to his father in a loud voice, “Dad, dad, the bull’s f**king the cow.” After a moment of shocked silence, the farmer turns to his son and calmly says, “Next time, son, be a little less explicit. You should have said. “The bull […] More

  • Want a day off work?

    So you want a day off. Let’s take a look at what you are asking for. There are 365 days per year available for work. There are 52 weeks per year in which you already have 2 days off per week, leaving 261 days available for work. Since you spend 16 hours each day away […] More

  • Vanishing Cream

    During a dinner party, the hosts’ two little children entered the dining room totally nude and walked slowly around the table. The parents were so embarrassed that they pretended nothing was happening and kept the conversation going. The guests cooperated and also continued as if nothing extraordinary was happening. After going all the way around […] More

  • Honest?

    Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day. “My name is Billy. What’s yours?” asked the first boy. “Tommy,” replied the second. “My Daddy’s an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?” asked Billy. Tommy replied, “My Daddy’s a lawyer.” “Honest?” asked […] More

  • Loving Wife!

    After examining a patient the doctor took his wife aside and told her that her husband was gravely ill but there were 3 things she could do to ensure his survival. 1. Give him three nutritious meals every day. 2. Do not nag him. 3. Make love to him every night. While driving back home […] More

  • Health Minister

    The health minister is visiting a psychiatric ward. He asks the head of psychology, “How do you determine if a patient is cured.” The psychologist explains: “We take them to the bathtub, which is filled with water, hand them a spoon and a cup and ask them to empty the bathtub.” “I see,” says the […] More

  • Dead or alive

    A Mexican bandit made a specialty of crossing the Rio Grande from time to time and robbing banks in Texas.  The banks offered a reward for his capture, dead or alive, but offered a much larger award for the recovery of the stolen funds. An enterprising Texas Ranger decided to track him down. After a […] More

  • The guilt!

    This guy comes home from work one day to find his dog with the neighbor`s pet rabbit in his mouth. The rabbit is very dead and the guy panics. He thinks the neighbors are going to hate him forever, so he takes the dirty, chewed-up rabbit into the house, gives it a bath, blow-dries its […] More

  • The Picture Diet!

    A married lady, visited her elderly parents’ home. When she opened refrigerator, she was shocked to see inside a picture of a lovely, slender, perfectly built young woman in two-piece bikini. Lady: Mom, what’s this? Mom: Oh, I put that up there to remind me not to overeat. Lady: Is it working? Mom: Yes and […] More

  • I’m The Boss!

    The boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn’t getting any respect. The next day, he brought a small sign that Read: “I’m the Boss !” He then taped it to his office door. Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note […] More

  • Same things as you do

    A man went to the doctor feeling very depressed. “What you need,” said the doctor, “is some companionship. Go out and find a girl who likes to do the same things as you do.” “But doc, why would I want a girl who likes whistling at other girls!” More

  • Worst Golfer!

    One day, John Smith decided to go to a new golf course where no one knew him, just to get away and see if he could do better elsewhere. He hired a caddy to guide him around the course. After another day of slices, duff shots, misread putts and bad temper, he was obviously upset. […] More

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