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Flattered husband

After the party, as the couple was driving home, the woman asks her husband, “Honey, has anyone ever told you how handsome, sexy and irresistible to women you are?” The flattered husband said, “No, dear they haven’t.” The wife yells, “Then what the heck gave you THAT idea at the party tonight?” Read More »

Happy Mother’s Day!

A family was having dinner on Mother’s Day. For some reason the mother was unusually quiet. Finally, the husband asked what was wrong. “Nothing,” said the woman. Not buying it, he asked again, “Seriously, what’s wrong?” “Do you really want to know? Well, I’ll tell you. I have cooked and cleaned and fed the kids for 15 years and on ... Read More »

Burglar

“Get this.” said the English bloke to his mates, “Last night while I was down the pub with you guys, a burglar broke into my house. “Did he get anything?” his mates asked. “yeah, a broken jaw, six teeth knocked out, and a pair of broken nuts. The wife thought it was me coming home drunk.” Read More »

To the Moon

After the tiring wedding ceremony, the tired groom gets romantic and says to the bride, “Darling, should I take you on a ride to the Moon or do you prefer the stars?” The bridely replies, “Sweetheart, why don’t you show me your rocket first. I will decide only after I see it.” Read More »

My Wife Won’t Like it…

One day I accidentally overturned my golf cart. Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer who lived in a villa on the golf course we were living at in Sarasota, heard the noise and called out, “Are you okay, what’s your name?” “It’s Jack, and I’m OK thanks,” I replied. “Jack, forget your troubles. Come to my villa, rest a ... Read More »

Expensive Dress!

Jennifer’s wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement – not even her parent’s nasty divorce. Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear, and would be the best-dressed mother-of-the-bride ever! A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn that her father’s new, young wife had bought the exact same dress as her mother. Jennifer asked her ... Read More »

Newly Married Bride

Once a mother-in-law explaining the working of her house to her newly married Daughter-in-law. She said, “I am the home minister as well as the finance minister of this house. Your Father in law is the Foreign minister of this house. My son, that is your husband, heads the ministry of demand and supply and my daughter that is your ... Read More »

Daring Husband

A famous inspirational speaker said: “Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn’t my wife.” Audience was in shock and silence. He added: “She was my mother.” (A big round of plause & laughter) A very daring husband tried to crack this at home. After dinner, he said loudly to his wife in ... Read More »

Small Town Policeman

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. “But officer,” the man began, “I can explain.” “Quiet!” snapped the officer. “I’m going to let you spend the night in jail until the chief gets back.” “But, officer, I just wanted to say,” “And I said be quiet! You’re going to jail!” A ... Read More »

A Marriage Made in Heaven

A couple were driving to a church to get married. On the way, they got into a car accident and died. When they arrive in heaven, they see St. Peter at the gate. They ask him if he could arrange it so they could marry in heaven. St. Peter tells them that he’ll do his best to work on it ... Read More »

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