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Two Friends

Two friends are talking and one says to the other, “I am so tired of people not understanding what I’m talking about.” His friend asks, “What do you mean?” Read More »

Strange People Are Here

There was a young Scottish boy called Angus who decided to try life in Australia. He found an apartment in a small block and settled in. After a week or two, his mother called from Aberdeen to see how her son was doing in his new life. ‘I’m fine, ‘ Angus said. ‘But there are some really strange people living ... Read More »

Flowers Again

As he was standing in line at the grocery store checkout counter, a friend of John’s noticed he was purchasing a dozen roses and a card. “You in trouble with Jill?” the friend asked John. “Nope!” was John’s reply. “Preventive maintenance.” Read More »

Six months…

The middle-aged man was visibly shaken when his Doctor advised that he had only 6 month’s to live because of the terminal disease that was detected during a recent physical check-up. The Doctor suggested that he should get his “house in order”, make sure his Will was current and ensure all final arrangements were in place for the funeral. He ... Read More »

Three Spies

Three Spies are captured in London. One is German, one is French and the other is Italian. First they interrogate the German spy and after 3 hours of torture he talks and is thrown back into the cell with the others. Then the French spy is interrogated, and after about 8 hours of torture they get him to talk and ... Read More »

Man Has Faith

A man goes swimming in the ocean but gets sucked out to sea. A boat passes by him and tells him to climb aboard but he says “I have faith, God will save me.” The Coast Guard comes by with a rescue helicopter and tells him to climb the ladder up, but he says “I have faith, God will save ... Read More »

Girl or Boy

A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl? B: It’s a girl. She’s my daughter. A: Oh, I’m sorry, sir. I didn’t know that you were her father. B: I’m not. I’m her MOTHER. Read More »

Conscience

An elderly Italian Jew wanted to unburden his guilty conscience by talking to his Rabbi. “Rabbi, during World War II, when the Germans entered Italy, I pretended to be a Catholic and changed my name from Levy to Spumoni, and I am alive today because of it.” “Self preservation is allowable, and the fact that you never forgot that you ... Read More »

My idea

I’m a mailman. At Christmas this year, Mrs. Jankowitz met me at the door and invited me in for a great breakfast spread. After I ate, I thanked her and she said, “There’s more.” She took me to her bedroom and showed me moves I had never imagined. I told her I had no idea she felt this way. She ... Read More »

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